Fifty Shades of Dave

Over the past few weeks I’ve been engaged in an aggressive promotional campaign to get people to visit my Facebook page. Which if you haven’t yet visited, can be found at http://www.facebook.com/specsrugssausagerolls.

So, anyway, my plan was to get at least 30 people to visit and click ‘like’ on the page, and as a bribe, I offered the chance to read a blog exclusive Dave story. One that would not be included in my ongoing short story project headed for publication in some form or another.

The inspiration for this exclusive was the explosion of interest in the Fifty Shades of Grey novel and it’s sequels.Without reading it myself, I figured I could have a go at writing filth linked together with a tenuous storyline barely strong enough to hold up to the most polite critique. Another thing which sometimes makes me laugh is the double standards that allow a women to admire a man’s figure, or go see a male stripper and it’s ‘a laugh’. Yet should a man want to admire the female form, he’s ‘a pervert’.

And so my project began when an opportunity in my ongoing Dave narrative allowed for a potential ‘Lost Weekend’ in which Dave could get up to the necessary activities, much like those Brookside specials that went straight to video in the nineties, but were still subtly alluded to in the television series. Or for the younger readers, like those Hollyoaks late night story threads that allowed them to show more ‘grown up’ storylines not suitable for the teatime slot.

And now, with a drumroll please, is Fifty Shades of Dave. If you are under 18, or likely to be offended by adult themes or awful writing, please divert your eyes, or go and do whatever under 18’s do these days. For the remainder, here it is…

Fifty Shades of Dave
Dave had decided that it was a good time to get away for a bit. Work was heavy, Donna was on the verge of moving in along with their daughter, Annabel. He took some money out of his savings account and headed out on the road. He stopped to get some petrol and a sandwich and then made a snap decision to head on down to Cornwall. As he drove down the motorway watching the junctions rush by, Dave considered how lucky he really was. He had a good job, a reasonable salary, enough money to get a deposit for a flat. Not to mention a beautiful child and a pretty good-looking girlfriend. But deep at the back of his mind he had to acknowledge the nagging feeling that he still had a bit of living left to do. 

Dave hadn’t really decided how long he was going to stay away, he figured that as it was only Saturday morning, he had the weekend to make a decision. Dave had reached the end of the motorway when it finally hit him how lonely it was driving on a long journey alone. Not even the musical accompaniment of Dave’s favourite bands could fill the hole usually filled by a travel companion.

So, anyway, it was mid-afternoon and Dave was feeling quite hungry. Unfortunately for him, he was driving along a deserted stretch of road skirting Dartmoor. It was about half an hour before he managed to reach some sort of civilisation. He stopped at a supermarket on the outskirts of Launceston. As he was waiting at the check-out he noticed a brunette a few check-outs down. She was wearing over-sized sunglasses and her hair cascaded over her shoulders down to her breasts. Dave was mightily impressed because she was also wearing a skin-tight black t-shirt with ‘Led Zeppelin’ printed across her chest. Dave somehow managed to get his timing perfectly right because as he stepped away from the check-out with his shopping bags, he inadvertently walked straight into the brunette girl. He turned sharply with apologies springing automatically from his lips. The girl dropped her shopping and staggered but stayed on her feet, which were encased in battered tan cowboy boots. She looked at Dave from behind those big sunglasses, her face almost expressionless. Dave took a step back. Ever the gentleman, he bent down to help the girl retrieve her shopping from the floor. She happened to bend down at the same time, and clashed heads with Dave. Gritting his teeth through the pain, Dave helped the girl to pick up her Cosmopolitan magazine, tube of Sour Cream and Chive Pringles and 34D lacy black bra. The girl thanked him kindly and they both stood up carefully, avoiding another head-banging.

Dave stood and looked at the girl. She stood and looked at Dave. There was an awkward silence before Dave handed her the bra. She took the bra and her glistening lips curled into a smile. Dave felt himself smiling in return, praying that he didn’t have anything stuck in his teeth. Evidently he didn’t because the girl didn’t recoil in horror or start laughing and pointing at him. In fact, she tilted her head to the side and pulled her glasses down a little with her free hand. Dave found himself gazing into deep dark brown eyes and he suddenly felt like he was falling. And this was all without knowing her name or hearing her speak. Finally Dave decided to break the silence only for the supermarket tannoy to suddenly gurgle into life to request a clean-up in the milk aisle. Apparently a carton of cream had exploded, and Dave was starting to know the feeling himself. The spell was broken by a smelly old man shoving past them, and then the girl was gone. Dave’s heart fell, but only for a moment – he saw the girl at the cigarette kiosk.

Not wanting to come across as a stalker, Dave walked slowly towards the exit, having the odd glance back. He was pretty impressed with what he saw. From the back, the girl looked just as awesome – the hair in a loose pony tail, the black t-shirt looked good too, and the denim min-skirt showed off tanned, toned legs. Dave thought to himself that this was almost like a dream. Eventually, the girl finished buying her cigarettes and walked towards Dave. As she walked past, he was convinced he saw her wink at him behind her glasses. He watched her stride seductively across the car-park and almost yelled in triumph when she stopped at the car next to his. Brimming with confidence, Dave sauntered over to his car and finally broke the deadlock.

“Hello again,” he called over.

“Oh, hello,” she replied. Her voice could melt concrete, Dave thought to himself.

“I’ll try not to drive into you,” he joked. She smiled, and Dave heard a little laugh.

“I’d like that. Are you as clumsy in a car as you are on your feet?” She chastised him, but jokingly.

“No, no.” Dave could feel his confidence slipping. He wanted to get into the car and drive off. But something kept him there, probably his sex-drive.

“Well, ok,” the girl smiled.

Dave took a huge leap into the unknown. “My name’s Dave, by the way. Just in case you were wondering.”

“Well, Dave, it’s nice to put a name to the face. And in case you were wondering, mine is Sabrina.” And with that, she wandered over to where Dave stood and held out her hand. Dave responded in kind and they shared a firm but not too firm handshake. Dave was impressed with her firm shake and soft, warm skin. Sabrina took out a pack of tic-tacs and shook them at him. She flipped the lid and held them out to Dave. Not wanting to seem rude, Dave nodded and held out his hand. Sabrina took it and held it while she poured a few out into his palm. Dave said thanks and nonchalantly tipped them into his mouth. The suaveness ended there though as they caught the back of his throat and sent him into an undignified coughing fit.

Eventually Dave recovered his dignity and composure, after what seemed like an age of coughing, but was really only about thirty seconds. Sabrina had stood waiting for him to recover, but as the seconds passed, she began to look concerned. Just before Dave recovered, she had stepped up to him and patted him on the back. Now, it wasn’t often that hugely attractive women came up close to Dave like that. Even less often that they touched him. But there she was, standing to the side of him, up close. He could feel her breath on his neck, feel her body pressed up against his. Her hand stopped patting his back and he felt her tracing a line down his back to his bottom, giving it a gentle caress. Dave turned his body to face her full on. He caught her eye, their gaze locked together in a moment of mysterious passion. She pressed up to him, her other hand feeling for his manhood, then she stopped suddenly and Dave could see a glint in her eye. She leaned in to him and put her mouth to his ear.

“Is that a Mars Bar in your pocket, or are you just pleased to meet me?”

“Ah, actually, it’s a Double Decker,” Dave admitted sheepishly.

“Wow, it’s hard,” Sabrina whispered seductively.

“Yeah, I got it out of the vending machine, so it’s chilled.” Dave arched his neck to see what effect this bombshell had had. As it turned out, he needn’t have bothered, as Sabrina hooked her leg behind his left knee sending him sprawling against his car, her body pressed on top of him.

“You want to take a drive?”

Dave was not expecting that. He got flustered for a moment. “Your car or mine?”

“Well, yours looks a little roomier than mine” laughed Sabrina. Dave peered over to see a little Fiat 500 parked next to his car. He nodded in agreement. And with that she moved off Dave and sashayed round to the passenger side. Dave recovered his composure and had a look around the car park. It seems their episode had gone unnoticed and ignored by prying eyes.

Dave unlocked the car, flung his shopping on the back seat and quickly got in to remove the empty sandwich cartons and crisp packets and drink bottles that had accumulated throughout the journey so far. He rammed them into a spare bag and that too went onto the back seat. As he finished clearing up, the passenger door opened and Sabrina got in. Dave noticed she hadn’t got her shopping with her, but assumed she had just put it in her car for safe-keeping.

“So, where are we going?” Dave asked, trying to be cool. Unfortunately, his brain had chosen this moment to start creating images of newspaper headlines in his head, along the lines of:

‘Mystery of Car-jacking Death on Dartmoor’ and ‘Body found in river is missing Shropshire man’.

He looked over at Sabrina, who was busying herself in the little mirror you get in the sun visor, and, strangely enough, his libido overcame his fears of a horrible, lonely death. She turned round to face him, a knowing smile appearing.

“I’ll direct you, don’t you worry. I know somewhere quiet where we won’t be disturbed.”

The alarm bells rang in Dave’s head, but he turned the key in the ignition, and the resulting rumble of the engine and noise of the stereo successfully drowned them out.

Sabrina guided Dave back out towards Dartmoor, rifling through his music cd’s as she did so. She picked out a Led Zeppelin compilation and put it on, turning the volume up to an unprecedented level. ‘Black Dog’ blasted out of the speakers at such a volume that Dave couldn’t hear his heart moving up into his throat and beating like crazy. As they pulled off onto a little dirt track that headed into a little wood, Dave said a silent prayer to his loved ones and slowed down to avoid potholes and a dead badger. Eventually, Sabrina pointed him to park underneath a big old oak tree where the lower branches had sagged to almost touch the ground, the foliage creating a screen from any prying eyes.

He killed the engine, and there was a moment’s silence as the engine, and the music, died. He turned to see Sabrina unbuckling her seat belt. He watched it snake back between her breasts and clunk back against the door. Dave sat there feeling a little awkward now, watching Sabrina.  She looked across at Dave, smiling seductively. She was still wearing the sunglasses, which Dave felt gave her an extra air of mystery. He smiled back at her, and said another silent prayer hoping to survive this day.

“It’s really quiet out here, isn’t it?” Dave squeaked.

“That’s how I like it,” Sabrina said, leaning over towards Dave. Her hand appeared on his knee. Dave jumped a little, taken by surprise.

“Are you nervous?” Sabrina whispered. “There’s no need to be,” her hand squeezed his knee and slowly moved up his leg. Dave told himself to relax. Her hand was now firmly on his crotch, and she was rubbing in a slow circular motion. Dave’s body did the relaxing of its own accord.

It was quite clear now to Dave that Sabrina was definitely ‘up for it’, and any attempt by him to touch any of her erogenous zones was unlikely to result in a screaming frenzy and police charges. While she worked her magic, Dave turned and placed his hand on her left breast, around the ‘lin’ of the ‘Led Zeppelin’ on her t-shirt. True enough, no screaming occurred. He felt her chest rise and fall with her breathing, and then started to massage her chest. She stopped him, and took his hand off. Dave panicked for a second, but calmed down when Sabrina removed her sunglasses, placed them carefully on the dashboard, and pulled her t-shirt off, up over her head. Beneath the t-shirt was revealed a bright white bra.

‘Mmmmm,’ thought Dave to himself. ‘I bet she uses Daz.’ He momentarily froze, giving himself a mental reminder not to say such things out loud in case Sabrina heard it.

Dave reached over and helped Sabrina get the t-shirt over her head and free from her flowing dark hair. Sabrina smiled and reached forward. She pulled Dave’s football shirt up over his head and flung it over her head. She took a look at Dave and rolled her eyes when she saw he had yet another t-shirt on underneath the first one. She tugged at it and looked Dave straight in the eye.

“Get it off,” she whispered. Dave complied without a word, and that joined the growing pile of clothes in the back seat, amongst the shopping. They both sat there, Dave now completely naked from the waist up, Sabrina still wearing her bra. He leaned over and pulled her towards him, his hands feeling round her back to try and undo the bra. After a moment of fumbling, Sabrina reached round with a sigh and undid it with a flick. Dave pushed the straps off her shoulders and pulled the bra away to reveal her breasts in all their glory. They were nicely shaped, the right nipple had a bar through it. Dave caressed them with his hands, feeling her soft warm skin. Sabrina put her hand back between his legs, undoing the button, and inching the zip down on his trousers. She put her hand inside his boxers and Dave felt something stirring. Before he could get too exciteable, Sabrina pulled her hand out, reached down under the driver’s seat and pushed back. Dave’s seat shot back against the back seat, Dave momentarily in shock. Before he had chance to do anything else, Sabrina took the initiative and climbed over on top of him, then sank down into the foot well between his legs. She tugged his trousers and shorts down and then he could see nothing but the top of her head, but he could feel a hell of a lot more.

She took him right to the edge, but stopped there, sitting back up with a fiery, lustful look in her eyes. Dave was completely in her power now. If she had told him to get out of the car and run a hundred metres and back naked, he would happily have done so.

“Did you like that?” she said, playing with her hair, twirling it around her fingers. Dave looked back and nodded wordlessly. She let her hair go, and it fell down over her breasts, but he could see her nipples poking out between the strands. Dave shuffled in his seat to prevent his arse going numb. Sabrina carefully got up, avoiding the steering wheel in her back and climbed on top of Dave now. She pulled the denim mini-skirt up round her waist to reveal matching bright white knickers. Again, Dave supressed the urge to comment on her bright whites. Sabrina leaned over him, her breasts and hair in his face, and wound the seat down to a more reclined position. Dave could really smell her perfume, and it made him feel a little light-headed. She sat back and her hand found Dave’s manhood. Dave took a look around him, savouring the moment as she fondled him. The windows were well and truly steamed up, and that was as much as he could see in all honesty. Sabrina pulled her knickers to the side and manoeuvred Dave in, and that was pretty much that for the next five minutes or so.

Dave and Sabrina were sitting back in their seats, trying to catch their breath. Dave was struggling more than Sabrina was, but to take his mind off it, he watched her casually smoking and staring out of the window. She hadn’t bothered to put her bra back on, so he could see her erect nipples beneath the black t-shirt which once more adorned her tanned, slightly sweaty body. Dave had always felt a little uncomfortable when naked, so he was fully dressed – including his underwear. Conversation was hard to come by so Sabrina had put the stereo on to listen to more Led Zeppelin. As the speakers blasted out ‘Stairway To Heaven’, Dave piped up eventually.

“Do you do this sort of thing often then?”

Sabrina finished her cigarette, stubbed it out on her hand and then threw the butt out of the car window.

“Not really, no. Only when I’m bored and lonely.”

Dave nodded in understanding, despite not really understanding. Sabrina let out a heavy sigh and twirled her hair in her fingers. Dave watched her chest rise and fall. Dave checked his watch which showed that it was nearly tea-time, a fact that was confirmed when an unholy growl erupted from his stomach. Dave held his breath when Sabrina turned to look at him, but when she burst out laughing, Dave relaxed enough not to bother when his stomach spoke up two more times. Sabrina saved him from further embarrassment.

“You hungry?”

Dave nodded eagerly.

“Shall we go and get something then?” She asked him. Dave was slightly taken aback at the use of the word ‘we’. He managed not to let it show outwardly though, and nodded again.

“You want to come back to mine? Or go somewhere?” Again, Dave nodded. “I will need an actual answer, David,” Sabrina chided.

“Well,” Dave retorted. “That depends whether you can actually cook.” He smiled broadly at her. Sabrina laughed and slapped Dave on the shoulder.

“I can cook, thank you,” she said. “As it happens, I was just thinking of a take-away.”

“Sure, why not then. I haven’t got any plans yet,” Dave commented, suddenly having the horrible realisation that he hadn’t got anywhere to sleep yet.

“Let’s go then,” Sabrina shouted, slamming the dashboard so enthusiastically that it made the cd jump. Dave chuckled as he turned the key in the ignition. He reversed back out on to the track and headed back the way they had come.

When they got back to Tesco’s in Launceston it was slowly getting dark. Sabrina sprung out of Dave’s car and into her own. Dave waited for her to get sorted and lead the way to her place. As they drove off in their own little convoy, Dave stuck close behind Sabrina’s little Fiat, not wanting to lose sight of her just yet. Partially because she was gorgeous, but mainly because he was on the promise of food.

Anyway, Dave followed Sabrina’s Fiat all the way to Tintagel. By the time they got there the sun had set and night was upon them. Sabrina turned into a driveway and parked up so Dave followed her and parked beside her. He got out of the car, and the moment he did so, he had the sudden need to pee. Sabrina was fiddling about in her car for what seemed an eternity before getting out and locking her car.

“I can’t find my bloody house-keys,” she cursed into the night air.

“I’m busting for a pee,” Dave confessed. “Is there any chance you could have another look?”

“Oh, it’s alright. My house-mate can let us in. Come on.” She passed Dave and walked down a path to the front door. With a flourish, she knocked on the door. Dave followed behind, trying not to think about needing a pee. As he got to the door, he stood beside Sabrina and admired the large brass lion door knocker.

“Wow, that’s a big knocker,” he innocently commented.

Before Sabrina could answer, the door swung open and there, framed by the house lighting, stood a slim, blonde woman wearing a silky pink dressing gown tied at her waist.

“You forgot your keys again, dumbo,” the woman said. Then she saw Dave. “And I see you’ve brought a new playmate?”

“Forgotten? Oh, thank God, I thought I’d lost them,” Sabrina said, an air of relief in her voice. “Oh, yeah. This is Dave.” She turned to Dave. “This is my house-mate, Mel.”

“Umm, hello, Mel,” Dave said, hesitantly. The urge to go to the toilet was beginning to take over. Mel stepped aside and Sabrina beckoned Dave to go inside. He did so, with Sabrina following behind. The three of them stood in the living room. Dave finally snapped.

“Is it okay if I use your bathroom? I’m busting.”

“Sure, I’ll show you where to go,” Sabrina said. She led him up some narrow stairs. When they reached the top, she pointed him to a room at the end of the small landing. “It’s in there. We’ll be downstairs looking at menus.” With that, she disappeared back downstairs.

Dave made it to the bathroom and had a most welcome pee. He flushed and washed his hands on a towel that hung over a small radiator. He came back out of the bathroom and shut the door behind him. As the bathroom door closed, quite by chance, the door to his left creaked open. Immediately after he recovered from the shock, Dave felt an overwhelming sense of curiosity. Ignoring his built-in sense of ‘don’t snoop round the house of a woman you picked up in a Supermarket, then had sex with in your car’, he poked his head round the door. He was confronted with an unholy vision: the walls were painted scarlet red, there was a bed in the middle of the room with metal head and foot boards. On the wall furthest from the door stood a wardrobe. Next to the wardrobe was a set of shelves, on which Dave could see whips, handcuffs, studded paddles and some masks. Not wanting to see anymore, Dave quickly pulled his head back and closed the door gently. Wiping beads of sweat from his brow, he headed back downstairs.

Mel and Sabrina were sat on the sofa, poring over various takeaway menus. Sabrina looked up as Dave sat down quietly in a chair.

“Better?”

“Much, thanks,” Dave informed her.

“We’ve got Chinese or Pizza,” Mel said, without looking up. “And I, personally, could murder a pizza.”

“Pizza suits me,” Sabrina agreed. They both looked at Dave, expectantly.

“Well, it would be rude not to,” Dave smiled. Mel snatched up her mobile phone from the arm of the sofa. Sabrina took a menu from the floor got up and came over to Dave. She sat on the arm of his chair and draped herself over him. She showed him the menu and dropped it in his lap. He picked it up and looked through.

“Barbeque Chicken sounds nice,” he suggested. Mel had, by then, finished dialling and was already giving the order to someone on the other end. After ordering a Meat Feast and a Four Cheese along with Dave’s Barbeque Chicken, Mel went into the kitchen and returned with a bottle of wine and three glasses. Sabrina went back to sit with Mel, leaving Dave sat alone again in the chair.

When the pizzas arrived some half hour later, a second bottle of wine had been opened, and Sabrina and Mel were giggling away together while Dave looked on. As Mel jumped up off the sofa, something tugged on her dressing gown, causing it to fall open. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you see it, Dave got a full frontal view of her naked breasts and tight black shorts. He averted his eyes desperately, in case Mel or Sabrina caught him. Mel just laughed and re-did the gown up as she went to the door, picking her purse up from the table on the way.

Sabrina stared at the television, drinking from her wine glass, and Dave remained in the chair, trying not to think of Mel’s breasts in case anything happened in the trouser department.

Mel paid the pizza man, and came back with three pizzas. She dumped them on the coffee table and sat back on the sofa. Sabrina looked at Dave sat on his own like a spare part.

“Shove up, Mel, then Dave can come over and join us on the sofa instead of being sat over there like a spare part.” Mel looked over at Dave, sighed and shuffled over, leaving a Dave-shaped space between them on the sofa. He got up slowly, struck by sudden mental images of a drunken sex and pizza orgy with the two women he was about to plonk himself between. Gingerly, he sat down in the gap, and sank down a little. As he settled himself, Sabrina picked up the pizza boxes and opened the top one. She reached across Dave and handed it to Mel, who took it off her and began to eat. Sabrina had already checked the other two out and handed a box to Dave. He peered inside to see his Barbeque Chicken pizza, almost begging to be devoured. The three of them sat in silence, eating their pizzas, drinking wine, and watching a dodgy American reality show on television.

Before Dave knew it, time had flown by and it was coming up to midnight. He glanced at his watch and his look of horror must have alerted Sabrina who looked at him curiously.

“What’s up?” She asked him.

“Umm,” Dave hesitated. “It’s nearly midnight.”

“Really? God,” Mel said, genuinely shocked.

“Well, the thing is,” Dave continued. “I hadn’t actually managed to book a hotel for tonight yet.”

Sabrina looked at him, eyes wide with surprise. “You’re not going to get anything at this time of night.”

Dave nodded gravely. Sabrina shot a look across Dave at Mel. Dave could feel Mel’s eyes fall on him.

“Well, there’s always this sofa, if you’re happy to slum it with us girls tonight,” Mel offered. Dave looked at Mel, and then at Sabrina. Neither gave anything away to hint or give Dave confirmation that it was a genuine offer, and not just politeness for the sake of politeness.

“Well, if it’s not too much bother. I really don’t think anywhere would be open at this time.” Dave hesitated. Again, the mental images of orgies came to his mind. He supressed them forcefully.

“It’s settled then,” Sabrina said, commandingly. She reached over to pick up what was now a third bottle of wine and filled up the three glasses lined up. Mel shook her head and hauled herself up, using Dave’s leg as support.

“No more wine for us. I’ve got something much more fun.” With that she disappeared into the kitchen. Dave could hear her rooting in cupboards, clinking glasses. She finally returned with a bottle of Sambuca and three shot glasses. She held the glasses out for Sabrina to take off her, and unscrewed the bottle. She then bent forward and poured out three generous shots of Sambuca. As she did so, her gown gaped open, giving Dave yet another look at her assets. He averted his eyes away, only to come eye to eye with Sabrina, who was gazing at him, but not in an angry way. If Dave had to describe her look, it would have been ‘drunken lust’. The moment was broken by Mel banging the coffee table and shouting their names.

The drinking finally ended around two in the morning. Mel and Sabrina went off upstairs, leaving Dave to stretch out on the sofa with a blanket and a spare pillow. With the lights off, Dave drifted off into a drunken slumber. As he slept, he had what he assumed was a dream about Sabrina coming downstairs to find Mel lying on top of him, naked and fondling him. Then he could hear his name being called. He sleepily opened his eyes, saw Mel stood over him, and closed his eyes again. He turned on to his back, and then felt pressure on his legs. Once again, he struggled to open his eyes. To his surprise and considerable consternation, there was Mel, sat straddling his legs wearing the silky dressing gown, which was now completely open to reveal her bare breasts, one of which had one of those Chinese symbols tattooed on it. Her stomach was smooth with a bar through her belly button. Dave tried to sit up but Mel shook her head and pounced on him, knocking him back down, her body pushing down on him, one hand reached out to cover Dave’s mouth, the other she put to her lips in a shushing gesture. Silently, she inched her way back down towards Dave’s legs, peeling off his boxers as she went. Feeling slightly afraid, but incredibly turned on, Dave just lay there while Mel proceeded to suck him until he could take no more. He closed his eyes as the energy pulsated through his body and out. Eventually, he felt the weight lift off him and when he dared to open his eyes, he was all alone again.

When morning came, all too soon, Dave was woken by the sound of sizzling and the smell of bacon. He raised his head gingerly off the pillow, fighting the urge to throw up, and coping honourably with the incredible throbbing in his head. As he finally swung his legs round and sat up, Sabrina came out of the kitchen carrying two mugs of something hot. She put them down on the coffee table.

“Coffee?”

Dave groaned thanks through the pain in his head. Sabrina sat beside him on the sofa. She was wearing a white t-shirt with a Mod target logo on it, and some red satin shorts which just about covered her bum cheeks. As Dave leaned forward to pick his mug up, Sabrina turned on the television to watch the news.

“Is Mel up yet?” Dave asked?

“No, Melly sleeps in on a Sunday,” Sabrina replied, not taking her eyes off the television. Dave shrugged and nodded his head in understanding.

“Does she have a boyfriend?” Dave continued. Sabrina turned to look at him. Dave looked her in those deep brown eyes of hers.

“God, no. Mel prefers women. She’s a total lezzer,” and with that she put her head back and laughed. Dave raised his eyebrows.

“You don’t fancy her do you?” Sabrina laughed. She turned to look at him once again. Dave shook his head emphatically and took a sip of his coffee to avoid further questioning. “Do you fancy me?” Sabrina asked suddenly, out of the blue.

“Ummm,” Dave paused. “Well, I guess so,” he continued. “Are you a lesbian too?”

“Oh, no,” she shook her head. A guilty look came over her. “I had a boyfriend until yesterday morning.”

Dave looked at her in surprise. “What happened yesterday morning?” He asked.

“I went to see my ex and found him in bed with another girl. He pretended like it was me that was in the wrong. So I told him to fuck himself.” Dave could hear her voice starting to go, so he gave her a pat on the back, then a comforting rub. Before he could get too comforting, she got up and went into the kitchen. Dave watched her go as he drank his coffee.

After a bacon sandwich and another coffee, Dave started to prepare himself to leave and find somewhere to stay for the remainder of his adventure. He had decided to ring work on Monday morning and ask for a few days off. He was confident that this wouldn’t cause a problem. He asked Sabrina if there was anywhere in Tintagel that he could stay, to which she replied that there was. Dave was about to ask where when Sabrina got up and went upstairs. While she was gone, Dave got dressed again and waited. He was watching a countryside programme on television when Sabrina came back downstairs.

“You don’t have to go yet, if you don’t want to. I’ve checked with Mel, and she’s happy for you to stay.” Dave looked at Sabrina as she stood leaning against the bannister.

“Okay then. Thanks.” Sabrina smiled, and Dave found himself smiling too. “Now, is it alright if I nip in the bathroom to freshen up?” He asked. Sabrina nodded and Dave picked up his toothbrush and deodorant and went off upstairs.

When he had finished, as he was coming out of the bathroom he bumped into Mel as she came out of her bedroom. She was still wearing the silk gown – well, possibly not ‘still’ wearing it, perhaps wearing it again. Now though, she had tied it up. She looked at Dave, and Dave looked at her. A look of recognition passed between them over what had taken place during the night. Mel winked. Dave smiled nervously.

“Sabrina tells me you’re a lesbian,” he mentioned casually. Well as casually as you can mention something like that to a woman who, only a few hours ago was quite definitely sucking on his knob.

“Well, yeah,” Mel confirmed. “But I get the occasional craving for a bit of dick, if you know what I mean?” Dave blushed. “Don’t worry though, I’ve been satisfied for now.” With that, Mel chuckled and went past Dave into the bathroom. Dave shook his head in disbelief and went downstairs.

Sabrina was sat on the sofa, still wearing the same outfit as before, but now she had a pair of bright white pumps on her feet. She stood up and handed Dave his trainers.

“Come on. Let’s go out and I’ll show you the place where I live.”

“Sure, okay,” Dave agreed as he knelt down and put his trainers on his feet. Sabrina then handed him his jacket, picked up a cardigan off the back of the chair and guided Dave out of the door, taking a set of keys as she did so.

As they walked down the road, Dave and Sabrina began to learn a bit more about each other. Dave told her all about Donna and Annabel, and his little wobble when it came to moving in together as a family. Sabrina listened silently, her expression not giving anything away. When he finished, she turned to him and looked straight at him.

“You ran away from serious responsibility because of a stupid dream?” Her voice was a little strained. Dave shrugged his shoulders guiltily, but said nothing. They carried on walking for a while before she spoke again.

“Do you love her? Do you want to be there for your daughter?” She asked him.

“Yeah,” Dave replied without thinking. Then he stopped dead. “What am I doing here?”

“Fuck knows,” Sabrina told him, matter-of-factly. “But let’s get an ice cream anyway.” She took Dave by the hand and pulled him towards her. They resumed walking until they arrived at a little ice cream kiosk in the town. Sabrina ordered a vanilla ice cream and a bottle of water. As she licked the ice cream, she cradled the bottle in the crook of her arm. The bottle was cool, the day was warming up. Sabrina moved the bottle away with her free hand, and Dave could see a wet patch on her t-shirt which being white allowed Dave to notice her nipple.

Dragging his eyes away, Dave turned to the man in the kiosk and asked for a Raspberry Nipple ice cream. With a flake. Thankfully the man misheard him and gave him a Mint Choc Chip instead. Together, Dave and Sabrina walked down a steep bank out towards the coastal path. As they did, Sabrina took her turn to tell Dave all about her boyfriend, his University degree, his commitment issues. That was followed by her wanting to be a model, being worried about Mel, and wanting a baby.

They found a bench and sat and watched the sea and the seagulls, and tourists walking past. Dave gave her some flattery to keep her happy, she returned the favour to give him the confidence to go home to his awaiting family.

Out of the blue, Sabrina asked him if he’d ever had a threesome. Dave confirmed he had once with Donna and her friend in Malta. He told her the story of how both women became pregnant and turned up claiming he was father to both. Sabrina laughed herself to the point of not being able to breathe properly.

“Well, is there anything you would like to do before you go back to settling down?” She asked him. Dave looked at her. He struggled to regain the ability to speak.

“Do you like bondage? Mel’s got some wicked stuff we can borrow. Or she can join in, if you like?” Dave’s mouth dropped open.

“Ah, no, no that’s okay,” he finally managed to splutter. His mind conjured up images of Mel stood over his shackled naked body lashing him with those whips he’d found. He stood up, and took Sabrina’s hand, pulling her to her feet.

“Let’s go, I might think of something while we walk,” he said purposefully. As they walked, Dave casually put his arm around Sabrina’s waist. The two of them got back to the house and as Sabrina was letting them in, Dave held her back. He pressed her back against the wall and pushed the hair out of her face with one hand, holding it back. Sabrina relaxed and tilted her head to one side. Dave leaned in and planted a kiss on her lips. She returned the kiss with interest, pushing into Dave, her arms wrapping round his back. Their legs became tangled and the kisses more passionate. As Dave came up for air, Sabrina managed to whisper to go inside. She pushed past him, grabbing his hand and pulling him through the door after her. As they stumbled through the living room and up the stairs, they met Mel on her way down stairs. Sabrina was giggling with excitement and rushed straight past her. Dave followed helplessly behind, waving geekily at Mel with his free hand. There was a forlorn look on her face, which Dave only saw briefly before he was virtually dragged the rest of the way up the stairs and through a door.

Sabrina threw him on the bed and jumped on top of him. As they kissed, Dave could sense her mind was distracted, and her hands were searching for something. It was only when he felt something cold on his wrist did he suspect anything was amiss. Before he knew it, Sabrina had handcuffed his left hand to her bed frame. He was unable to voice his concern properly, seeing as her lips were still clamped firmly to his. With a clink, Dave’s right hand was also handcuffed, leaving him totally helpless.

“This wasn’t quite what I had in mind,” Dave said, when Sabrina stopped kissing him for a moment.

“Oh, I think you might change your mind when you see what I’m going to do to you,” she replied, a glint in her eye. Dave raised his eyebrows questioningly. He rattled the handcuffs against the bed frame. Sabrina smiled, let out a little giggle and left the room. Dave had a look around him, saw what looked like a fairly tidy room. The walls were painted cream, the ceiling was a dark blue with little stars dotted around. Dave was wondering if they were glow in the dark, when the light went off suddenly, thus proving that they were indeed glow in the dark. Before his eyes could become accustomed to the dark, he felt hands touching and pulling at his clothes. Dave could hear heavy breathing in the room, and as hidden hands started to unbuckle his belt, the door opened and the bedroom was suddenly bathed in light. Dave shut his eyes tightly against the sudden brightness.

“What in bloody hell are you doing?” He heard Sabrina shout. The hands that had been on him were gone. Dave heard a different voice.

“Oh, Sabrina. I’m sorry.” It was Mel. Dave opened his eyes slowly.

“Get out. Now,” Sabrina shouted. Dave started to struggle with his handcuffed hands. “Not you, Dave. Her.” As Dave’s vision slowly cleared, he saw Mel push past Sabrina and out of the door. “Some fucking lesbian,” she screamed after her. She slammed the door so hard, it made the lamp shade wobble above the bed. Now, Dave’s eyesight had properly recovered, he could see Sabrina still standing by the door, a livid look on her face. Her dark hair cascaded over her shoulders. She was wearing a familiar black bra, black hot-pants and thigh high boots. She sat on the bed with a sigh.

“I wonder how many other of my men she’s copped off with despite being a fucking lesbian?” Sabrina fumed. Dave kept quiet, hoping it was a rhetorical question. Thankfully it was, because the silence seemed to soothe her. She shrugged her shoulders and stood back up again. She resumed where Mel seemed to have started, by unbuckling his belt, loosening it, and then working on his jeans. First the button, then the zip, slowly inching it down. Then, with a flourish, she pulled his jeans right off. Dave felt a little heat on his legs, probably from the friction. He stifled a yelp, and waited for the next move. Sabrina climbed on top of him, and began to peel off his t-shirt. It was only when she pulled it over Dave’s head that, together, they realised the difficulty that lay ahead. It wasn’t going to be easy with his hands cuffed to the bed. Sabrina looked at him, and with an apologetic look, ripped his t-shirt clean away.

Dave, who was very attached to his clothes, tried to hide his anguish at the destruction of his t-shirt. Still, faced with Sabrina’s scantily clad body on top of him, he resolved to grin and bear it. Only for nature to intervene as Dave began to require a pee. He piped up to call for a pause the proceedings. Sabrina kindly released him from the handcuffs in order to answer the call. Dave quickly went to the toilet wearing only his boxers, keeping a wary eye out for Mel. He did what was required then rushed straight back to Sabrina’s room to resume their activities. As he rushed in through the door, Sabrina pounced on him and pushed him over to a chair at the end of the bed. She climbed on top of him and handcuffed Dave to the foot of the bed, sat on the chair.

As Dave looked incredulously at her, Sabrina walked over to a little stereo and pushed a button. Out of the speakers came Marvin Gaye singing ‘Let’s Get It On’, and Sabrina started to dance. She rolled her hips and gyrated seductively towards Dave. She proceeded to give Dave an awesome lap-dance which got Dave all excitable to say the least. When the song finished, there was a short silence before another Marvin Gaye song started, this time ‘Sexual Healing’.

Sabrina turned round to face Dave and leaned forward over him, giving him a look at her cleavage. Dave noticed something shiny and between her breasts. He buried his face in her cleavage and pulled out a key between his lips. Sabrina gave him a little round of applause and took the key from him. She unlocked the left hand, and Dave pulled his hand free and gave her bottom a playful slap. Sabrina groaned with pleasure, and Dave slapped her again, a little harder this time.

Once both of his hands were free, Dave grabbed Sabrina by the waist, spun her round and pulled her down so she sat on his lap facing away. He began to massage her chest in circular motions. Sabrina reached round and unfastened the bra, allowing Dave to pull it away from the front. He flung it away on the floor, and resumed the steady massage of Sabrina’s now naked breasts. She squirmed against him as he did so, rubbing against his thighs and stomach as he sat. He was getting quite an erection now, making his boxers uncomfortable. Sabrina shuffled forward a little and moved her hands round behind her, feeling for Dave’s erection, and upon finding it, rubbing it.

The room was seriously beginning to hot up, and Dave couldn’t take anymore. He stood up, led Sabrina to the bed and flung her down on it. As she looked up at him, he pulled off his boxers, knelt down and slid her black shorts down her thighs, past her knees, over her boots and finally off. He span them round on his finger and they flew off across the room. He smiled, Sabrina smiled back. Marvin Gaye finished.

Then Serge Gainsbourg started with his ‘Je t’aime… moi non plus’. Dave climbed on the bed, straddling Sabrina, both completely naked (but for Sabrina still in her boots), and lowered himself down. They were now skin to skin, moving with the music. Dave started to lick Sabrina’s nipples gently, rolling his tongue over and around making them erect. He could feel her writhing beneath him. Her hands were grasping at the duvet, pulling at it as she moaned with pleasure. With her left hand, she felt for Dave’s erect penis (look, there, I put the word ‘penis’!) and began to pull gently at it. Dave ran his hands through her long hair, then down her sides to her waist. As his hands wandered lower, to her hips, the outside of her thighs, round to the inside, Sabrina let go and grabbed him round the hips, a little too tightly, trapping Dave’s hand between them. Sabrina released her grip a little, allowing Dave to trace a line up the inside of her right thigh, feeling the heat of her skin beneath his fingertips. As he reached the promised land of her vagina, Sabrina took hold of his index and middle fingers and guided it inside her. She arched her back and her moaning got louder as Dave probed inside her, feeling her wetness. Sabrina reached out and opened one of her bedside drawers. She rooted around and pulled out a little square packet. She lifted her knee, forcing Dave away, rolled him on to his back, and climbed on top of him. She tore the packet open, revealing a condom. She took hold of Dave’s penis and rolled it down slowly and seductively from top to base. It was Dave’s turn to groan with pleasure. Sabrina lowered herself down, and Dave could feel himself sliding up inside her. She took control of the situation, gliding up and down as Dave lay on his back, looking up at her as she did so. He placed his hands on her hips to guide her, but she pushed them away.

“I’m in charge here,” she smiled. Dave just shrugged and let his hands drop down to his sides.

Just as Dave was getting used to the sight of Sabrina moving up and down, her breasts bouncing a little, her hair falling in her face only to be brushed back by Dave’s hands from time to time, Sabrina stopped and slowly turned around, keeping Dave inside her all the time. She resumed her up and down movements, but Dave didn’t really like this new position. He raised his knee, leaned to the side and rolled Sabrina over onto her side, putting them in the spooning position.

In this position Dave found it easier to control the pace, gently thrusting as he massaged her breast with his one free hand (the other one was trapped beneath Sabrina’s waist). As Dave reached the point of climax, he pushed forward almost sending Sabrina sprawling off the bed. He clung on to her tightly as the jolts passed through him, the sweat from his chest acting like glue sticking to her back, which was also damp from the exertions.

Dave tried not to fall asleep in the immediate aftermath, and offered to go and make a coffee. As he was hunting for his boxers, Sabrina propped herself up on her elbow and stared at him.

“What are you doing?” She questioned him.

“Putting something on,” Dave replied, flinging clothes around.

“Don’t,” Sabrina said. Dave shrugged his shoulders, admitting defeat in his search. He went to the bedroom door, opened it to see if Mel was lurking about. Satisfied, Dave ducked through the door and down the stairs. He got to the bottom and stopped dead. Mel was lay on the sofa watching television. He tried to backpedal up the stairs, only to bang his heel on the step behind him with a thud. Mel looked up. Dave was stood on the bottom step in all his glory. He quickly put his hands down to cover his genitals. Mel just laughed. Feeling a bit confident that she wouldn’t dare to try anything again, Dave minced his way through to the kitchen and began to make coffee.

As he was waiting for the kettle to boil, Dave stood looking out of the kitchen window, so he didn’t see Mel come in. Subsequently, when Mel gave his bare bottom a caress, he jumped a mile into the air. He span round to face her, only making things worse, as he was full frontal naked in front of her. Mel went to grab him, but Dave moved away. She went for him again, and Dave moved away again. As Mel made one more lunge towards him, Dave stepped back and whacked his head on the cupboard door he had left open earlier. As he staggered forward, seeing stars, Mel grabbed him and pushed him against the worktop. It was at this point that Dave passed out.

When he finally came to, Dave found himself lying on the sofa with a blanket over him. He lifted the blanket a little to check his state of undress and was relieved to see he was at least wearing his boxer shorts. He looked around for some indication as to what the time was, and when he finally caught sight of a clock, he saw with alarm that it was coming up to Five o’clock. He tried to get up but his head was still a little woozy. He sat up and gathered his strength. He didn’t know where the girls were, so he gave a pathetic shout. No answer was forthcoming. While he gathered his strength, he sat on the sofa and watched a bit of the news. There was no reports of a missing Shropshire man, no pleas from his family for him to return or people to come forward with information as to his whereabouts. Instead it was all about the Middle East or Afghanistan or Iraq. To be honest, Dave never really watched the news because it was always so depressing. He absent-mindedly checked his phone for messages, finding about ten texts and missed calls from Donna. He then checked the social network sites, wisely choosing not to tell everyone that he was down in Cornwall and had been giving some girl a good seeing to.

Boredom got the better of him and eventually, he caught his breath and stood up. Swaying momentarily, he put his arms out for balance. He slowly made his way up the stairs, and as he reached the top, he could hear some moaning noises coming from one of the rooms. He went to Sabrina’s room to try and retrieve his clothes and as he walked past a door that was slightly ajar, he heard a squeal from inside. He stopped outside the door, and held an internal debate as to whether he should check it out. Not surprisingly, curiosity got the better of him (despite all those warnings about the fate of the cat) and he slowly edged the door open. He stood in the doorway and watched as a completely naked Mel was bent over and spanked by an also completely naked Sabrina. Dave surveyed the scene before him, appreciating the two specimens of naked womanhood and coughed involuntarily. The two women stopped and turned.

“I’m just taking my punishment,” Mel explained. Dave nodded, silently.

“She’s been naughty and has to be punished,” Sabrina added, twirling the spanking paddle in her hand. She gave Mel another tap on her bottom for good measure. “Do you want a go?” Sabrina offered.

“If I said no, would you believe me?” Dave finally managed to blurt out.

“No,” the women giggled in unison.

“You can spank me too,” Sabrina suggested. Dave raised his eyebrows as he considered this new offer.

“To be fair, I’m still a bit woozy from banging my head,” Dave admitted. “I think I’m going to head off home.”

Sabrina looked crestfallen. Mel shrugged her shoulders. Dave turned and went to leave the room.

“Feel free to carry on what you were doing,” he said as he went through the open door. He went to Sabrina’s room and proceeded to locate his clothes and put them on. Whilst he did so, he could hear moaning coming from the other room. Dave checked he had everything and wandered back down the landing, passing Mel and Sabrina now rolling around on the floor touching and kissing each other.

“See you then,” he called out. The women didn’t even acknowledge him. He made his way downstairs and let himself out of the house. As he walked down the path he heard a thud and looked up to see Sabrina pressed up against the window, her breasts pushed flat against the glass. Dave gave a wave and got into his car. He started the engine and as he put the car into reverse and checked his rear-view mirror, his mobile phone buzzed. He cursed and put the car back into neutral and put the handbrake on. He looked at the screen, which showed a new text received. He opened the message which was just a picture of Sabrina completely naked with everything on display. Dave smiled, deleted the message and put his phone away and drove off into the night.


If you’ve managed to read this in one go, well done to you! If not, it just means I’ve had extra visits to this blog!

Before I go, a quick thank you to those that have already liked the Facebook page, and an extra thank you to those who helped to spread the word during my advertising campaign. If you like this, please leave a comment, and then head over to the Facebook page and give it a ‘like’ for good measure (if you haven’t already done so!)

JM 21.08.2012

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